As some of my previous blog posts indicate, I'm not too much for New Year's resolutions. I've never been good at giving up carbs, sugar, or red meat (for longer than Lent), my exercise regimens can and do last for quite a long time, but they do require regular re-vamping, and the struggle between optimism and Schadenfreude is a daily one. But we're having an unseasonably early spring here in Germany, I've had two day-trips away from K-roo in the last 3 days, both with absolutely ideal weather and, against my better Bostonian judgment, I swapped out my winter wardrobe for my spring/summer wardrobe which means the return of all the clothes I really like to wear. With the return of turquoise, my 'power color' (as my friend Zach calls it), the disappearance of all things sweater-like into the vacuum storage bags, and the tick-tocking away of the minutes toward my birthday, I'm feeling contemplative. So I took a little trip down blog post memory lane.
Just before I turned 30, I took stock of the things I'd accomplished between 20 and 29. Bought a house. Finished my doctorate. Started running. I also found this little list of things I wanted to accomplish before 35.
Things I'd like to do between 30 and 35
run my first marathon, and then some
suck even less at Italian
get a shredder and a bigger filing cabinet (to downsize the paper crap)
take a real vacation (no family, no auditions, no work) with my husband
learn Lulu
reconsider playing softball in the summer
learn to make really good pie crust
add another continent to my passport stamp collection
spend more time with my friends and family who live far away
I've italicized the ones that I've since completed. It's a bit of a mixed bag, really. I've spent more time with friends who lived far away because I moved to Europe and suddenly, they're a lot closer than they were before. On the flip side, I'm now even farther away from my family. The number of Italian operas I've done in my life has doubled in the last six months - including a massive Handel opera with a metric ton of recit - so my Italian is infinitely better than it was before. I did run my first marathon and another few half marathons after that, but a series of injuries and crazy travel schedules really got the better of my running. I still haven't taken a real vacation with my husband, though hope springs eternal and, unless there's a summer softball league at the opera house I don't know about, I suspect softball is right out. But I made some serious pie crusts and they were GOOD.
My sprained ankle is nearly healed. I made notes on my pilates classes and have been doing the ab/core/back work at home, at least twice a week, plus the stretches from physical therapy. While I don't have the knees or the lower back that I did in my 20s, at least I'm aware enough not to ignore tightness or discomfort, shrug it off, and keep pushing. What the heck does any of this have to do with personal growth? It's about listening. I'm finally listening to myself. I ditched my toxic US agent back in January. I put my foot down with the administration about singing a role I didn't think I was ready to sing. I stood up for myself, firmly but professionally, with a director. I'm learning to pick my battles, not just to pick them carefully, but to win them. I realized, somewhat sheepishly, that I've spent the last two birthdays in Germany. Last year, in KA with my boo. The year before, in Frankfurt with a friend and colleague. And two years before that? I made it back to Boston from Germany only days before my 30th birthday party. The universe pointed to Germany and we decided to listen.
So here's to finding out what the universe has in store for the next few years. How about that list?
Things I'd like to do between 34 and 39
run another marathon
improve my conversational French
take a real vacation (no family, no auditions, no work) with my husband
learn Lulu
add another continent to my passport stamp collection
spend more time with my friends and family who live far away
practice patience, truth, and grace in my professional and personal life - in short, what I preach
And with that, I'm going to go cuddle with the best birthday present - Sammy the dog, who came into my life 11 years ago, and continues to make it a sweeter, if furrier, existence. Happy (almost) birthday to me.
