Someone tries to take Shiksa for a ride

Let me be clear about this. My mother is a hard-ass. Her parents were hard-asses. Apple falling far from the tree? Not so much.

So what, Mr. Stick-up-your-ass Seller, makes you think that I will simply lie back and think of England when you're trying to screw me over? You hemmed and hawed about the stainless steel appliances, to which you agreed in the offer, and said that it would destroy the 'country kitchen' that you had designed. We already know my opinions on the country kitchen, so I won't bore my readers with a recap. You sent the appliance proposal, even though you KNEW they were not in accordance with the specs laid out in plain English in the offer and again in the purchase and sale documents. You tried to tell us that it was not possible to find a refrigerator with an ice maker and a water dispenser that was Energy Star rated. This is, quite simply, a lie. And then, your agent had the NERVE to say that you really didn't want to go back and forth so much on the appliances and that we should just go with what you suggested.

Have you heard of the internet? Have you heard of HomeDepot.com? Are you aware that I can just make a few little clicks with my finger and see exactly what it is that you're proposing, how much it costs, and how it compares to the other appliances that are less expensive AND more energy efficient? Did you think we wouldn't look? Did you think we wouldn't do our homework when you first told us that you were installing a full set of Bosch in the house and that our eyebrows wouldn't go up when you turned around with a hodgepodge of older model GE?

You thought we were a young stupid couple buying our first house. You thought that because we were a young stupid couple we would be soooo in love with the house that we wouldn't research things, or that we wouldn't have the time and would simply agree to whatever you said. You thought that by indicating your impatience with the tedium of selecting appliances, we would be cowed into going along with what you said. Well I've got news for you mister - YOU THOUGHT WRONG.

I love this house. I do. I've already picked out paint colors for each room, envisioned curtains and shelving and where everything is going to go in the kitchen (which will be painted a lovely shade of Tiffany Box Blue). But I get reaaaaaally angry when people seem to think that they can take me and my husband for a ride. And it takes a great deal of willpower to write the kind of civilized email that I wrote this morning, in which I politely requested that the seller simply reduce the purchase price by a nice round dollar amount, a dollar amount that we would use to put the appliances in ourselves. But I wrote the email because I'm smart, educated, and have the strength of character not to reach through the computer and STRANGLE YOUR SORRY ASS FOR INSULTING MY INTELLIGENCE.

Fuck you. Nasty letter to follow.