birthday girl

Today is my birthday.  I am 32 years old.  

The farther away from my 20s I get, the more I start to consider what it means to invest in my own happiness.  I was talking with my friend Nadine just last night - she's on this fabulous whirlwind trip NYC - Bloomington - Florida - and she was saying that the happiness generated from seeing old friends and familiar and dear places really puts into perspective the insignificance of whether or not a house wants to hire us, or whether or not an opera director likes us enough to front a plane ticket.  It seems very small, when compared with the joy of real life. 

I have a great husband, an amazing dog, our car is paid for, we own a home, I have gigs, we have good health insurance, my husband has a wonderful job, and we are about to embark upon the adventure of moving to a new place.  Anyone who knows me knows I hate change, but really, change is the only thing that's constant in life.  I'm not going to be one of those women who says, "Oh, it's my 29th birthday, for the 3rd time *wink wink*" because I'm happier at 32 than I was at 29.  I'm not going to keep looking back over my shoulder and saying, "why aren't things the way they were?" because they never will be again.  And that's really okay.  What's in front of me is still infinitely possible, infinitely promising.  Every day is an opportunity to invest in my own happiness.  So instead of making the list of things I want to accomplish (which seems to have been a theme in my type-A style of birthday commemoration), I'm going to make a list of ways I wish to invest in my own happiness.

1.  choose to celebrate where I am, instead of where I'm not
2.  rejoice in my innumerable quirks, and the people who love them
3.  spend no sunny days indoors
4.  continue to run, just because it makes me happy
5.  appreciate my family for who they are, instead of being agitated by who they are not
6.  find beauty in the skin I'm living in
7.  love my friends and family half as much as they love me
8.  recognize when down time is needed, and take it without regret
9.  jump at the opportunity to see the ones I love
10.  invest in the work I love, and try to let the rest go

And with that, I'm going out into this day, the first day of my 33rd year on this earth.  I'm going to the gym and in search of cupcakes.  Germans make cupcakes, don't they?