I'm also multi-tasking in parts of my life. Yesterday it was "take the dog for a long walk and get my cross-training in at the same time." Sammy did four miles of walking and so did I, but I didn't get home and go to sleep on my big fleecy pillow, nosir. It was also "visit with friend while scrubbing the bathroom." In that respect, I was the most successful. I know I'm supposed to be looking into greener ways to keep things clean, I know I should, but Lord help me, I do love the smell of a bleached bathroom. It is a childhood illness from which I may never recover.
The biggest new ring to my circus of existence is the faculty applications. I am searching for these jobs every single day. I am reformatting my cover letters and double and triple-checking my CV. I am sending transcripts or NOT sending transcripts, preparing CDs of "unedited recordings," (what exactly does that mean??) and preparing myself for the barrage of questions from the people whom I have asked to write letters of recommendation (are you moving? are you going to stop singing? will your husband move too? OMIGOSH people. It's just an application until there's an offer on the table. Until then, let's view it like an exercise in skill-building. Good? Good. Yeesh.) while also trying to keep perspective about the actual jobs and where I might consider going to work.
It's hard to envision a life that would involve teaching full-time and auditioning as well. I tell myself that colleagues of mine make it work and that I could make it work if it came to it, but in my heart of hearts I'm really not sure. I don't know what "faculty job" looks like other than the teachers I've had, none of whom were still performing really. Part of me is excited at the prospect - teaching students, having my own studio, making a difference in the lives of young musicians, starting from day one with the golden rule of preparedness so that none of my kids are the ones who show up without their music learned. There's also the added benefit of some financial stability - benefits, a salary, retirement. Things that would make my financial adviser ever so happy, and keep me from fretting over whether or not I can afford to have these three fillings fixed (no, miss thang at the dentist's office, I can't have them done in silver, I show my teeth to the world for a living, thankyouverymuch). But there is the fear that taking a full-time faculty job will put a crimp in the pursuit of this crazy thing called singing. Will I have time to read through my recits when I'm also reading vocal lit papers? Will I have time to learn and practice Lucia when I'm teaching German diction to my young ones? There are a lot of unknowns and I'm trying to be patient. My friend Althea said I sound like such a good Presbyterian when I say I know I'll end up wherever I'm supposed to be. In the words of George Michael's immortal acid-wash jeans, "I know I've got to have faith (a-faith, a-faith, AH).
For today, it's in the cosmos. And I am here, in my house, in my jammies, and I've got to shake a tail feather. Rehearsal in two and a half hours, a voice to wake up, and a tummy to feed. Thursday is the day I get back on the road. I always sleep better and breathe easier with a few miles under my feet. Today's best to you and yours, and a shout-out to Cindy as she takes on her first race this weekend! Go git it girl!
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